This Is Where...

2009-08-11T15:25:00.003+08:00

basically this might be my last active post here..more active posts will be at www.wan-soul.tumblr.com..

this blog remains though,

its like an adrenaline rush when my eyes meet, the excitement is out of this world, but sadly it stops there, coz i have to bite my tongue n juz shut up, because i noe it'll ruin everything i had, the fun the tears the happiness the love..

NDP Roadshow
of caramel, choco chips n oreo cheesecake

when its time to tell, i'll tell, even when the time is too late for me, i'm juz happy we met

2009-08-08T03:57:00.002+08:00

It seems all of these words could'nt be further from the truth.
How did I get here, what did I do.

I'm blind, my eyes, where did they go to.

hanging on to things all impossible

2009-08-07T00:30:00.002+08:00

i guess its juz a slight pass by thingy right..i should noe better den to be doing this..why am i still hanging den..? grow up SouL!!!!!

its u who passed by..and u sat and watch..now u both linger..

2009-08-06T04:06:00.002+08:00

this vivid image in my mind, what does it mean, in every dream, in every thoughts, its always about what it has always been, life, tsk, so miserable, going back to my old habits, at least i'm happier den....

sometimes u lose out when its too late..

2009-08-05T02:55:00.003+08:00

What if, if, never comes at all..and all this is just a dream that i created..

things aint wat it use to be anymore..missed u much..really..

2009-08-03T16:44:00.005+08:00

tsunami...devastating natural disaster..rare..but deadly..
my heart..equals to that natural disaster..in 2 ways..number 1, rage..number 2 love..
some food for thoughts for whoever wants to get in my head..very little information..but very useful..

2009-08-02T20:07:00.001+08:00

Bugs are surrounding everyone..please take gud care of yourself..

tidal waves are unpredictable..

2009-07-31T22:26:00.003+08:00

sick..unable to eat..unable to drink..i wonder in my deepest slumber..how am i going to survive tomorrow..

and not even a single soul cares shit anymore

ur random late night text really made me confused..i noe it does'nt mean anything but it mde me missed u so..

2009-07-31T03:59:00.002+08:00

its not love..maybe its juz infatuation..or maybe its over concern..i haf this feeling for u but i juz bite my tongue n keep it quiet because i dun wanna make things any worst..i like the way we are now so i juz stay that way..

"its like a sore in the throat..irritating..but we all live in the same world..breathing the same air..why is it so difficult to connect.."

i noe..a short post..thanks syam..it inspires me to write something short but super meaningful..lol..

2009-07-30T02:52:00.003+08:00

another day at work..another hard labour..but i luckily manage to survive the day..well barely..after work went to met fariz and syam..fetch fad at vivo..den off to mac near holland..apparently fad have a fan there..lol..we were like having laughters all night..
den off to syam's blk to chill a while..sheila came down too..chit chatting till now..
hmm..i guess thats all i have to say now..ya i noe rite..boring day..

yea u're the smart one..i'm the dumb ass..i'll forget i even had that little feelings for u (hu would'nt)..i should'nt haf but it happened and i was happy den..i noe wat i'm going to do now..un worry it wont affect anything..

"i'll juz bite my tongue,
and i dun wan to speak these words,
cause i, i dun wanna make things any worst"

2009-07-28T15:15:00.004+08:00

so..another day at training..slacking too much already..time to start back MY type of training soon..well fad say we can start after the shows ended..haish..anyway..i really dun like the attitude some people are showing during trainings..stretching is an automatic thing..u dun haf to be asked to stretch..u do it on ur own accord..i dun wanna say names but once official training starts dun blame the seniors for being rough..thats for training stuffs..
aft training went down to civic for a chill session..some monkeys decide to climb up the wooden pondok and take some photos..lol..had a bit of fun and laughters..but this awful thing in my mind keeps disturbing my peace..
its like a twirl in my head..i dunno y but it still occured to me that i still care..but y is it that u haf to be acting the way ppl are saying u are?if u were not or if u're sensible enough i would haf still bothered about u..but its the thing of the past now..i juz hope this time round it wont be the same..if it were to happen though..which i doubt so it will..

"i strongly haf some tingling feel when u're around..but i try to avoid it because i noe u would'nt let go of him that easy.."

lets juz say i'm like an emo shit now..which i should'nt be..but hell..hu cares anyway...

u walk passed me with ur earphones in ur ear and i said i love u aloud but i noe u would'nt hear..

"and i want to speak this words,
but i guess i'll juz bite my tongue,
and accept somedays, somehow,
as the words that we'll hang from,
cause i dun want to make things any worst.."

2009-07-28T00:24:00.002+08:00

confused....

i dunno wat to be thinking..wat to be done..wat to be felt..
wat is this confusion running thru me?is it u?or u again?or is it juz my imagination..
the way u are now..its so different..and the way u are is so unpredictabe..i dun noe wat i shud be thinking..or i shud'nt be thinking anything..but why is it so difficult to not keep my eyes of u..its like an addiction..aaarrrgghhh...i dunno anything anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-=SouL=-

its u i'm thinking about now..
but its juz not right for me to be doing..
no one care's anyway..

2009-07-27T02:39:00.002+08:00

26 july '09

woke up at 9am..woke kechik up..went to bathe and str8 to potong pasir to fetch kechik..thanks for accompanying me to yewtee to return the van..
aft that trained down to jurong point for my show..did a little stretching..and registering the routine which i juz got to learned in 5 mins..like i noe..rite...lol..
1:3o is the show and i shud say we did an awesome job..GO SPHYNTRIX!!!!!!aft the show waited to see f2dm dance and also the fashion show..and waited again till 6 plus for the same show..cant help it la..very fun..lol..
aft everything went 'lepakings' at titanic..and oh my goodness fad and i'in really entertain us the whole night..there was so much laughter everyone went back wit a cramped stomach hahakz...
so yeah thats basically my day..tmr training..hope to see everyone..i mean..everyone!!!
hahakz..thats all for tonight..

..SouL..

this time no one is going to noe anything..i'm keeping it to myself..

u shud noe better..hu u are..

and yes..i hope u can juz leave me alone..stop caring for me like u used to..we're juz normal frens now..i dun wish for anything more anymore..

i've fallen yet again..but this time b4 i fall in the deep dark well..i'd rather juz let it be how it is now..it feel better this way den getting hurt..

2009-07-26T05:04:00.002+08:00

Juz got back after a long day..went to jurong point to watch dem Sphyntrix and f2dm shows..but i missed Sphyntrix's show because i was late..lol..had fun watching f2dm dance..and thanks ppl for 'saboing' me to go on stage to play that game..i was eating seh at that time!!n thanks kechik for accompanying me on stage hahakz..
after that went down to wisma to spot Sphyntrix's last show for the midnight shopping thingy..was fun but tring too..
tmr's gonna be my first show after soo long..yeah!! so i gonna rest now..

SouL signing off...

sometimes...its right beside u and u dn even realise it..

be the b****...trust me i dun givea shit anymore...so dun bother...

hypocrytes are being hated..ure lucky ure a fren to me...

2009-07-23T01:45:00.002+08:00

i am wat i am..and adding up to the disappointment is wat i saw today..i dun think those texts mean anything now..i juz haf the feelings its juz for the sake of sending..to make me feel better?i dunno..is it?i dun care anymore..about anything anymore..about you..about her..about she..about everybody..i'm not the one u can juz push around with..do not take advantage of my kindness because i can get ugly when i get mad..its gud enuf that i tell u to leave me alone..thts the better thing for u to do and for me to really give up like wat u wanted..u thought we were okay?well i haf to remind u that i'm juz wearing a mask..being plastic..so as i dun drop tears infront of anyone..to learn to control is to suffer..yes i'm suffering..yet no one is ever really there for me..and everytime i juz haf to climb myself back up frm where i fall..fcuk life..why am i even born..........

Happiness level not rising but sadness level going down a bit..

2009-07-22T03:39:00.003+08:00

Like my post title says..i guess i am not gonna fall into the drain and get wet again..i realise wat i shud do and all thanks to u 'ke ai'..hahakz..

Tues,
same ol' same ol' early in the morning went to work..mickey was late today..tot he'd never wake up..but he did and joined us in the afternoon..work was..well same as every other day..tiring like hell..and the whole time i'm wishing that we could end early so that i could go for training..but den again as usual..we onl get to end work at 8pm..damn it..

after work went str8 home to shower and change..reached rp around 9 plus..everyone's aready slacking..tried twisting to hands with i'in..but failed both attempts..u gotta lock ur legs adeq!!!also tried heights wit kechik..also never lock..sorry daxiong almost sprain ur ankle..hee..aft training sent the team to wld mrt..den qid and gegerl to home and also nizam..den off to amk sening maomao..had fries as my first meal of the day..haha literally..den to phy's place..talked things a bit..but din end that well..anyhows str8 off to potong pasir sending kechik home..thanks kechik for cheering me up..ad ya the fries also haha lucky i never choke u ass..and i had fun talking to u guys juz now..

life has been so difficult for me now..problems everywhere i go..i'm not confused anymore but why is it everytime u send me those type of msg i would feel guilty and wanna text u back..i controlled myself today because ireally dunno wat to reply u phy..phy..its even hard now to call u xz..haish..

i dun wan to hate u..but if u continue wat 're doing my heart will eventually grow its own hatred..i'm trying to move on but u're not helping..even though u are the one hu told me to give up..so wat is it that u're trying to do?i juz dun understand..i dun wanna think anymore..i wan to sleep it off tonight..i'm tired..tired of life..

wan_SouL signing off..

peace out..

You dunno me, You dun even care..

2009-07-20T21:21:00.002+08:00

well never tot it'd end up this way..i din wan to haf to be this way..maybe its me..maybe it u..maybe its us..well i cant think anymore..let it be now..watever happens i guess happens for a reason..so the story haf now come to an end..no more questions..no more tears..no more assurance..everything has come into the light to me now..tho' i still dun understand u but i noe very well that i wont fall again..once bitten twice shy? i need to get bitten thrice b4 i get it in my head..thanks to someone for putting it in my head..

10am:
went to yishun one to collect some tablecloth..den off to yewtee to return the van to uncle..i'm not working today so the van will not be in my possesion today..

1030am:
otw home on the train..i look into each and everyone in the train..thinking wat they might be thinking..do they have problems like i have now..or worst?or better?hu wud haf known..

1100am:
bought lunch for mum..lontong for her..and i got myself korean saba fish set at Banquet..and also some salmon sushi at the basement..damn i really miss eating sushi so i go 8 of them salmon and 2 kanis..

12noon:
watching queens of langkasuka on dvd while having lunch..its a thai movie about sorcery..its kinda cool movie..i actually enjoyed it..

3pm:
so damn sleepy..i gonna take a nap..

7pm:
am bored..watching jumper on dvd..holding on to hp hoping for someone to text..well..maybe i'm dreaming..y wud someone text me for no reason..haha..yea i'm going crazy..muz b the after effects of the booze last night..

10pm:
.............................
whole day rotting at home..hallucinating..dreaming..hoping..
shud haf juz go to work..damn..

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i wish i could tell u..somehow its juz not right..i noe so well its almost impossible for us..so i guess i'll juz take a step back and leave u alone..thats the best thing to do..

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

its over 2..

2009-07-16T03:56:00.002+08:00

now its really over..after wat u haf told me really breaks my heart..but at least i noe now it wont keep hurting me..nuff' said..i noe u wont be reading this but i juz feel like sharing it to the world..coz thats my life..shit life..n i tot i would not g crazy and do stupid stuffs but i dunno how i lost control of mysef juz now and did something regretable..i feel so damn guilty now..i can never be forgiven now..i'm sorry for my mistakes..i hope it'll be forgotten..i'm juz lucky i took control after everything felt so wrong..if not i would'nt noe wat else might happen..wat a mad mad world..haiz..i still feel very guilty..i wanna hit myself against the wall..bye..time for self punishent..

-=SouL=- signing off..

it's over....

2009-07-16T03:52:00.000+08:00

my tears run down like razorblades,
and no, i'm not the one to blame,
its you, or is it me?
and all the words we never say,come out and now we're all ashamed,
and there's no sense in playing games,
when you've done all you can do,

i lose myself in all these fights,
i lose my sense of wrong and right,
i cry, i cry,
it's shaking from the pain that's in my head,
i just wanna crawl into my bed,and throw away the life i led,
but i won't let it die,

i'm falling apart, i'm falling apart,
don't say this wont last forever,you're breaking my heart,
don't tell me that we will never be together
we could be over,

but it's over, it's over, why is it over,
we had a chance to make it,
now it's over, it's over, it can't be over,
i wish that i could take it back,
but it's over...

No worries...

2009-07-09T01:02:00.004+08:00

Thanks my dear frens for the supportive words. I'm somewhat grateful to have people like you all as friends.

TeddyTora, aku tau la, cume aku ingat this time round aku jumpe yang same macam made. But then harapan aku hancur la pulak. Tapi tak mengapa. Aku masih boleh bertahan lagi!! Kau tu, gi jage diri baek2. Da nak kahwin jangan noti noti!!! Hahakz!!

MaoMao n HsinMin, guess you both noe who i'm talking about on my previous posts. Thanks for caring, like i said no worries, im fine. Just still disappointed. In myself that is. Hope to see ya guys soon, as i wont be attending practice for the time being. Practice hard ok!!!!

Its already 1am and i'm still awake!!! hahakz..Crashing in at Nana's for tonight, coz' she was bored. Gonna wake at 7am to send Nana to work, then i go to work. What a boring life luh!! Luckily i'm having fun at work, thnks mick aka dinie for cheering me up at work, to AhLan too!! MAW brothers always finish early!! Hhakz.

So today is thursday, still deciding to go for the media coverage or not, dunno if there's training or not. Nonetheless i think i will spent my time with Siti tonight. Troubled girl, i feel pity for her. For those who dunno, Siti is my best girlfriend for more then 7 yrs now. We were there for each other if anyone of us had any problems. Then suddenly we jst lost contact, now we're back in contact and she's in a big whirlwind of problems. Guess as a gud friend i should be there for her.

Well, guess thats it for tnight, i got nutin else to type about. Until nxt time.

Wan_SouL signing off..

Heart's Broken, Hope's Shatered

2009-07-06T01:51:00.005+08:00

"Do you know what's worth fighting for, when it's not worth dying for.."

I so know what's worth fighting for, even i know so well it's not worth dying for. Funny, the feelings i had to sacrifice for what i thought was worth it. But why must all this happen again and again? Is my life just fake? Is my heart made of rubber? Are my feelings just a piece of paper youcan take and crush it? Am i just a waste of space in this world? These are the things i asked myself ove and over. But still i get no answers..

"Does it take your breath away, and you feel yourself suffocating.."

You took my breath away. The times we had. The moments i thought was perfect. It just took away all the air in me and strangled me. Suffocating is the right word. Somehow smetimes i just wished i could die. Because dying seems so much easier than living. Its just so hard to give it all up..

"Does the pain weigh out the pride,

and you look for a place to hide

did someone break you heart inside,

you're in ruins.."

The pain i had to keep after what people have told me really hurts me deep inside. The pride i had once falls right down the drain. I want to find a place to hide. To be by myself. But i just cant bcause when i'm alone, your face starts to appear in my mind. Which made it more harder to forget.

"When you're at the end of the road,

and you lost all sense of control,

and your thoughts have taken their toll,

when your mind breaks the spirit of your soul.."

I have nowhere to go now. And i just cant do anything right anymore. Everything seems to be wrong for me. My mind is in a twirl. Thinking of you and him really drives me crazy. Jelousy? More like i'm losing my mind. Call me crazy. All these just brought down my morale. I just cant take it any longer..

"Your faith walks on a broken glass,

and the hangover does'nt pass,

nothing's ever built to last,

you're in ruins.."

The hopes i had all falls into pieces. Like walking on a broken glass, i fall, first for you, next to sadness. Things i do to keep me occupied are not enough to make me forget. I know nothing is built to last, but the time to wait until it fades is just gonna take too long. I cannot wait that long or i'll go crazy.

"When it's time to live and let die,

and you cant get another try,

something inside this heart has died.."

I dunno when the time when i let go will come, but i know when that time comes everything i ever dreamed of will go too. And by that time too i wont take another chance even when i'm given one. Because the feelings inside will fade and eventually die. I hate to see that time come..

Best night i ever had.

The journey home that night was the most bautiful night i ever had with you. You slept with your head near my lap, my hands around your neck, and you held my hands tight. I wished the time frozed so i could hold your hands forever. Why must things turn out this way? I feel so broken..

(captions taken from 21 guns from Greenday)

Peace out from SouL

Had Enough

2009-07-05T05:42:00.002+08:00

i've had enough of forgetting people i loved...people i cared for...people i adore...

if this is wat u want then i cant do anything but still wait for u...

sacrifices i made were juz empty sacrifices...

the time i took to care for u wasted...

yes, u cant forget him too...

the person u adore...the person u care for...the person u loved...

i noe there's no hope for me...

u juz wanted me to give it all up...

but i wont, because i still care for u...

let people say wat they wanna say...

i'm stubborn by nature...

this is the way i am...and this is the way i will be...

i miss u...

"i'm sitting here, thinking bout, how i'm gonna do without, u around, in my life, how am i, i'm gonna get by.."

I Miss You Luh!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-24T06:34:00.005+08:00

supper wit lil sis n bro
i noe, sleepy face haha

three mishaps....

its already 5 plus n i'm still not asleep...gotta wake up at 9 to give babyzhu a surprise wake up call...lol...if not she gonna be an hour late again...and she gonna blame me haha...hmmm gonna be another tiring day at work again today...considering i'm still not asleep n i start work at 103o...omg...

thursday cheer training, if u guys are reading this please pass the msg down to other members...there are things we need to do and discuss...den again i'm not sure i'm coming this thursday hahakz...ok ok i'll be coming but late...

haish...i dunno wat to blog about reddy...hahakz...so i guess i'll juz stop here..

signing off,

irwan_soul

amongst every other people.

2009-06-22T11:29:00.003+08:00

i admit that i really like you, but i realise now i'm just amongst every other people, and i dun understand why all this is happening to me, i admit i was hoping too much, and i realise now that i can never do, i just dun understand why all this is happening to me, forget about me, just go back to where it starts, i'm just a nobody to you, i like u does not mean i can have u forever, i admit that i really like u, i just dun understand......

Monday monday monday.....cheer training tonight.still haven decide if i should go or not. y? i have my reasons. right now i'm still lazing around on my precious bed,

suddenly i feel a pinch in the heart. i miss her.. i really do... why must yesterday happen? did i do anything wrong? i'm just trying to make u understand.. if that was wrong den i'm really sorry.. ]

i noe where i stand,

i noe hu i am,

miss u..

-=SouL=-

signing off ):

..........................................

2009-06-15T01:40:00.002+08:00

thinking of eeu

Tiring day....................

slept at 6am and woke up at 3pm...den off to work.straight driving from 4pm to 12am.after work went for supper with the boss and the crew.had lots of tom yam soup with lots of sotong hahaz..

time now 1:43am, after i finish typing his i'm gonna go walk to mac to meet up with fariz, farah and the gang.hmmm wat else shall i write......guess thats all...

ps: someone ask me to blog about something...lol....there i blog liaoz...happy reading hahakz...

peace outz

-=SouL=-

The Moment

2009-06-02T00:48:00.004+08:00

Third Placing !!!!!!!

BU, Wildcards, Sphyntrix

Bangkok Uni and Sphyntrix

BU's Top Flyer

So SKM finally over...........

yes finally its over, the hard work, the sacrifices..all with a satisfiying result..we tot we could'nt but we break all barriers and prove some wrong..i love my team so much..the efforts we put in were not in vein..THIRD Placing Baby!!!!!! Ouh Yeah!!!

I need to be awaken.

nuff' of that..now comes the reality..i'm dead..seriously..i cant cope with my life anymore..what have i done to myself..i need to get my psyque back..i need to pull through again..i need to..i need to be myself again!!!aaarrrggghhh wat is happening to me.....i'm a failure..no matter how hard i tried, guilt always get the better of me..and thats the reason why i say i'm a failure..what am i to do now?how am i suppose to pull out of this one?somebody..shine the light towards me..i hate the darkness befalling me..

If that's not enough..all the other small problems decide to appear again..like..SHE had to call me on the day of my cheer comp finals..imagine how heavy my heart feels that day..(SHE=my longest ex) and den there is girlA..who decides to go mia..i cant seem to get a reply or an answer to my calls..what are you trying to do? if you don't wanna be a friend anymore den just say so..i wont blame you..but disappearing like that dont solve anything..

I hate my life, i hate myself, i hate you!!
the moment of truth..yeah right..

Finally here........SKM Semi's here we come...

2009-05-29T01:12:00.005+08:00

"join Pinoy Club!! free 100 mins!! Join Singtel!!"
The Hi Buddies!!!!!!

yeah yeah yeah i havent been updating this blog of mine for a very long time, been busy ya noe...wat with skm's preps..work..shows...well this update is also because MsCuteVoice wont give me her link unless i finish updating...hahakz...

ok here goes..first up..Singtel's road show was a blast...a fun and excitement enjoyed by all 8 of us every minute...yeah rilly it was fun...although the t-shirt was so the KeTaT(tight fitting) hahakz..serious it was so tight i tot i was gonna tear it apart like the HulK!!!!well not really la...juz exaggerating...lol...but it was also tiring considering the 5 rehearsals we had to do to make the organizers happy...hahakz...well it was well paid off i can say...

cheer pracs been kinda hectic this few days..wat not with SemI's coming near i think we deserve the scoldings...literally...but hey...cheer up ya guys we're doing this for he FUN and also for the GLORY!!!so dun be too caught up with oneselfs own desires...its about the team and the spirit...err....team spirit yeah that sounds much better...hahakz..come people buck up a little bit more its the SemI's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

last but not least...a random post...
"i wish i cud juz tell u how i feel but its gonna be so complicated for me and mostly for u..but the time we have now i'm gonna cherish because i noe well enuf it wont last long..why...? because i had experience which i dun wanna repeat...i really have feelings for u but even so u wont noe because i'm too 'chicken' to tell u...yes i'm so dumb...but wat else cud i do...this is the nature of my life...the SouL hu will always be alone..."

ok....done updating...so MsCuteVoice pls send me ur link!!!! hahahakz...
mish ya voice badly....hear from u soon kaes!!!!

peace out from SouL....

2009-05-02T03:48:00.003+08:00

another day another grief another sad story..
always there always be heard

nonetheless..cheer practice yesterday was, how can i put it, fruitful..but with some not turning up, we're still no where...yes..no where..come on people i thought we want to be on top..show the world Sphyntrix is back? well maybe some juz given up the virtue of nature..

virtue...hahakz funny the word i used eons ago...juz came right back into my life...well watever la...hmmm yes i'm stressed up too with the conditions like this..but wat can we do seh..focus on wat we doing lor..hahakz i'm getting crazy...answering my own question...

back to the top..amazingly i can actually hold 2 persons weight on me...with lots of help of coz...training on my one handed cartwheel to progress to an aerial...yes readers...an AeRiAl...well if you believe...miracles happen...SNAP!!!!!hahahakz...actually the real term is if you train hard the outcome will be desirable...hahakz...

to you...yes you noe who you are after reading this..remember...the reason he came back is because He is giving you a test..a test of self control of your life...juz remember the closeness now and the closeness then...its gonna be somewhat the same...but you have to ignore it...remember you 2 are now friends...and you are single...and besides there's always a macho hunk to keep ya company...or even me! hahahakz...pak pulau giving u advices from experience gorgeous...so try to keep in mind kae...

ouh my....its already 4 am...gtg and catch some dreamz now...hahahakzz...maybe i'll dream of me doing multiple aerials...HAHAHAHAHAKZ...well no one can forbid me from dreaming right...lol..see ya all soon aites...

peace out~ from SoulZ..

Goodbye My Almost Lover...

2009-04-17T23:45:00.004+08:00

You fingertips against my skin

The palm trees swaying in the wind

Images

You sang me spanish lullabies

The sweetest sadness in your eyes

Clever trick

I never want to see you unhappy

I thought you’d want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover

Goodbye, my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Can’t you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

I should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street

You took my hand and danced with me

Images

And when you left you kissed my lips

You told me you’d never ever forget these images, no

I never want to see you unhappy

I thought you’d want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover

Goodbye, my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Can’t you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

I should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean

I cannot drive the streets at night

I cannot wake up in the morning

Without you on my mind

So you’re gone and I’m haunted

And I bet you are just fine

Did I make it that easy for you

To walk right in and out of my life?

Goodbye, my almost lover

Goodbye, my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Can’t you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

I should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

What Have I Gotten Myself Into

2009-04-14T20:55:00.002+08:00

Satu fakta, dua penipuan yang pertama kita ambil, dua buang kenapa mengeluh? dengar cerita lagi, dah jenuh berkali-kali komplikasi dalam komunikasi jadi konfrontasi mulut orang perosak reputasi, pembunuh motivasi mereka pakar fabrikasi, modifikasi di depan senyum, belakang dengki yang cemburu mungkin teman kita sendiri siapa tahu?

one fact, two lies, the first we take, two we throw but why sigh? listen to another story, blase over and over, over complications in communication becoming confrontation, peoples mouths are destroyers of reputation, killers of motivation, the are experts in fabrication, modification, in the front they smile, at the back they stab, the one jealous might be ur own fren who knows?

yes yes yes i haven been updating..and when i update its juz a few lines...sorry elf for not making it a habit to update hahakz..been kinda busy..busy..what with work and stuffs..what with life and stuffs..like what is happening to me..temptations are taking over me..what have i got myself into..what am i going to do...haiz..i think its best to let all this quotes do the talking for me..deep deep meanings..if noe u'll understand..

awan mendung yang berarak bawa tangis bawa resah rebah rindu yang terkumpul semua birat dan kalimah semua janji yang terikat lebur disisimu

naik bukit angkuh cakap ayah jangan risau turun bukit pucat dengar tiga miaww kucing bawa tidur rimau bawa igau masuk tempat orang bawa otak bukan pisau tolak pintu gua tiga kerat tenaga kosong tak dijaga sampai datang tiga naga ingat nak berlaga tapi tak kan boleh menang menang dengan otak tak mesti dengan pedang

sebelum jadi bangkai ikan koi renang renang pura pura salah jawapan untuk naik berang panggil lima kawan atau biar pergi laju risaukan pekara remeh kita tak akan maju muka sama hijau hati siapa tahu merah dah menyala pasti mati siapa mahu gagap tiga kali bercakap benar saja bulan terang ramai yang keluar buat kerja panjat pokok buluh cari tukun air terjun naik sampai nampak dah terpegun turuntiga ular ikut lompat atau paut kalau lari mati jika jerut maut

Happy..Sad..Tired..all these mixed feelings are tiring me!!

2009-03-28T22:26:00.002+08:00

Happy,
SKM..we made it to the Semi's, i'm so happy and proud of the team. all the hard work paid off. all the trainings and practices. all the time we sacrificed. Sphyntrix, u are my heart an soul. congratulations to all team members, i think i prefer to call ourselves as family. yeah. family. we're like brothers and sisters now. sticking through thick and thin. now lets get together again for the Semi's and show what we're made of.
Sad,
Prudence(i noe missy,dun remind me)..been awhile now. maintainingthe distance. but somehow i feel lost. when i distance she starts to come close, when i get cmfortable, she juz run away. and thi have been bothering me. behnd the smiles n laughter lies a tear deep beneath. "i figured the world's not worth saving if you're not in it" this phrase from a movie really kept me thinking. it has a hidden meaning in it. something got to do with life. i really haf to stop thinking. but i cant. i really cant.
Unintended..something's wrong with her nowadays, been acting strange. like being around me is at the wrong time at the wrong place. but i do get jealous over hym(i think u noe missy). but its not that serious. i can control that. it juz gets me irritated sometimes. haha. what the heck.
Phone..finally my phone gets to rest in peace aft months of suffering(by the owner lol). he decided to shut off at 1207hrs today. i guess he had enough of being a flyer. dun worry, i'll replace u with a better one soon.
Tired,
worked like mad today. 9 hours of non stop repairing job. stopping for the most 3 mins will jeopardize the machine. yes that was how serious my work was today. and tomorrow is RT day. damn. i better get some sleep.

peace out from SoulZ

2009-03-27T00:08:00.002+08:00

Juz wanna upload some of he stunts photo's..

hee..enjoy folks..

What A Day....

2009-03-24T21:21:00.002+08:00

haiyo..what a hassle luh being a guy living in Singapore..

what else am italking about if its not NS...2 years not enough for the government,

still must complete 10cycles over the years some more..

thats not all..the famous IPPT, pass then u're free..fail and go RT..kina rhymes,

RT for every week twice a week..for 2 freaking months..

thats what i'm facing now..just came back from RT and it sux big time..

training was ok..seriously..just the people i have to put up with

that irritates me the most..

yeah..the people..why i say this is because..i can see no familia faces at all

its either uncles or big sized people like me all around..

kinda bore me when training coz the uncles try very hard to be in the front,

and the ones big like me and those bigger cant even be bothered to run..

so what irritates me is i'm all alone in the middle...

there will be one always one step behind me though..

always trying to 'overtake' me but give up every time he loses breath..

lucky for me Sphyntrix brought me into shape at least

enough to run continuosly.

haakzz..'nuf said bout those RT shitz..

now i'm home on the bed reddy doze of..

hopefully there's training this week or Sphyntrix,

i really miss all of you..being a working adult really demands time..

haiz..

thats it from me for today,gonna catch some rest,

another working day tomorrow,

peace out,

SoulZ..

Some SKM photos..uploaded by much loved, Missy!!

2009-03-22T11:51:00.002+08:00

Ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-03-21T21:37:00.003+08:00

Sphyntrix , I Love You All!!!

i'm going to take this opportunity to thank everyone in Sphyntrix for making today

a very very exciting experience. Everyone played a part and we did t damn good!!!

I'm so impressed by the spirit we all had and the team work we put together..

I'll pray hard we will go thru next round!!!

Tiring day it was, woke up at 6am to go take MC otherwise

i'll be losing my opportunityto compete together with the team..

meet up with the rest at about 9am...

and guess wat..the train system had to break down causing a delay when we were

suppose to meet up at 10!!!!

but its oryte..we made it at around 10 plus plus hahahakz,

had breakfast together as a team was really enjoyable..

i missed the tymes wit V...anyways, it was a supper sunny morning

and we were brushing up routines...i already pespire even before changing to full U..

get it people...FULL U!!!! yes finally i have a proper uniform to cheer!!!

hahahakz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so the tyme came to show at we can do..

shivers and fear come running thru my spine all of a sudden,

i'm sure some of u Sphyntrix feel the same...

and off the music starts and in my mind i'm thinking am i really doing this???

seems like a dream..everything went smoothly except for juz some minor glitches..

overall, i'm proud of myself, and the team!!!

SPHYNTRIX i will pray we go thru...!!!

st****es beware!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Been long enuf'

2009-03-15T20:11:00.003+08:00

hey people..yeah yeah i noe its been long since update,

farah i'm truly sorry, my lappy got infected,

so here i am now able to write my life's story again hehe,

120309

went out for a movie with some of us Sphyntrix

a show called 'coming soon'

i piece of advise, dun watch it wit a frail heart,

it was a super terrifying movie,

got shocked and suspenced 75% of the tyme!!!!

140309

anyway, its been almost 36 hrs without sleep,

worked morning shift last saturday,

de in the aft went for cheer training,

and den me shahrul n fariz had a 'slumber nite' at missy's,

the next morning (without any sleep at all) me n missy went

to bb fire station to attend fad's family day

finally aft that went to yew tee to meet up with nana

and off we go to fad's to prepare some stuffs..

pretty tiring weekend for me,

guess after matrix tonight i'll go str8 to bed..

thats all for noe folks..

peace out -=SouL=-

Cant wait for Sunday

2009-03-07T03:36:00.005+08:00

2:30am lepaking

6:00pm dinner at work

ok..

deprived of sshi, so decided to get some for dinner at werk.

super hungry and deprived of salmon. and guess wat,

they actually made new salmon sushi for me

coz i complained that the ones

on display was not so fresh.

how can i tell? well lets just say i've experience

salmon for a long time.hahahakz

after werk went to meet the gang
for a short lepaking session.
haish. hahakz. stop with the sighing kaez
u noe hu u are. hakz

and i'm waiting for sunday PEOPLE!!!
sushi buffet. omg. cant wait.
and missy i wanna make sure we beat the plates record hahahakz.

thats all for now,
peace out from -=soulz=-